The Mom Moment

I could spend a lifetime being pregnant. Another lifetime soaking up all that sweet love of the first three months. Another just watching my angels try to roll over for the first time. No amount of drool, spit up, fussing, burping, raw nipples, dirty diapers, late nights, back aches, runny noses or any other "unpleasant" motherhood thing would ever taint that beauty which is only found in the pure eyes of an innocent child.

Felicia grew quickly. She was eating that lovely runny rice cereal at about 3 1/2 months. At about 4 months old I started feeding her more solid cereal and introduced vegetables. This kicked her palate into overdrive. She wanted to eat all the time. I guess flavor does that to you. I stopped breast feeding her just shy of her 5 month mark. I had to. She was eating me alive! She went to formula and was now munching down every new vegetable I introduced with joy and passion.

The mothers among us know that every little change in a baby's life will be evident in the diaper. There is no better gauge of health or illness on this planet. While eating nothing but "boob" Felicia's diaper contained that cute seedy-mustard-y poo. When she started the rice cereal we found the occasional chunky-mustard-y poo. As the vegetables were introduced the poo took on the consistency of paste. Add the formula and you find, Toxic Paste. These diapers scared me. I took her to the doctor. I explained how her food has changed over the last few months. I explained that these toxic diapers had a "fouler" smell than I remember Kenny having.

Doc Hall said that it was normal. Some children digest things differently. She was healthy and happy and according to his experience she will just be one of those who digests vegetables with a more "gassy" result than others. He asked me, "do you get gassy when you eat green veggies?" I do. Ok. I get it. She will digest her veggies like me. I took a deep breath and told myself all will be well. When her diet includes fruits and meats, it will get better.

Now for the Mom Moment.

One wonderful Spring day, I made lunch. Kenny got a ham and cheese quesadilla, banana and some left over steamed carrots. Felicia was devouring a jar of yams and a half jar of spinach left over from the day before. It was a great time. We sat at the table, Felicia in her high chair, Kenny in his booster seat.

Kenny finished his food, drank his juice and started to wiggle. I wiped his hands, face and shirt and let him down. I wiped down Felicia, took off her bib and as I picked her up I noticed that tell-tale smell of a diaper change. We headed for the changing spot in the living room. I had a basket of diapers and wipes that I kept under the side table on the floor. It was a great system. Simply sit on the floor, spread the blanket, lay the baby, pull out the basket and everything was at your fingertips, organized and ready to go. I pulled off her diaper, wiped up the dark green, peanut butter textured, "call haz-mat" kind of toxic poo from her little rear end.

I heard a whine, looked up and saw Kenny coming from the dining room with a panic look on his face. As he got closer I noticed a strange drool coming from the corner of his mouth. As I reached for him he threw up all over me, Felicia and himself. I went into auto pilot. I grabbed a burp cloth (also in my organized-mommy basket) quickly wiped the bulk of half digested lunch from Felicia's legs and tummy, jumped off the floor, grabbed Kenny and ran to the kitchen. In front of the sink I stripped the clothes from his body, stripped myself down to just my underwear and tossed all into the corner of the kitchen. I picked Kenny up and sat him at the edge of the sink. I talked to him gently as he bent over vomiting again and crying in pain. I couldn't understand what was wrong! Did I give him bad food? His puke was horrible. Banana, cheese, tortilla shell, carrots and a small amount of some strange black-looking goo mixed in. I wiped him down. What the hell!!??!!

I finished cleaning him up, gave him a sip of water and he was back to normal. After putting a new diaper on him, I sat him on the couch with a book and focused on cleaning up Felicia. I took her to the sink, gave her a little impromptu bath (luckily there was only puke from her belly down), and put a fresh diaper and shirt on her. I dropped her into her bouncy seat and buckled her in. I threw myself into cleaning up the mess. I wanted my tranquil morning back.

I started from the changing area and worked my way back cleaning up puke as I went. I picked up the clothes, rinsed them out and set them in the laundry room. I cleaned the floor. I started to worry that Kenny had gotten hold of something really bad. Panic was setting in. I needed to find the source.

With the sink and kitchen floor clean, the changing area cleaned, I started working on cleaning up lunch. I wiped the table down. This whole time worry and panic setting in deeper and deeper. What caused this!? So bad was my stress, I didn't realize that I was going through all these motions naked except for my underwear. I checked on Kenny frequently. He seemed fine. The last thing to do was clean Felicia's high chair. When I pulled off the tray, I found the evil cause. A toxic poo smeared Kenny-sized hand print was on the seat.

Kenny ate Felicia's POOP!! Oh My GOD!! I didn't even notice that some had escaped the diaper. Usually when there is an overflow you will find poo running down the baby's leg. This was not the case. In fact while changing her diaper I remember thinking how lucky I was to catch it now because it looked like the diaper was at capacity. I was in fact proud of my nose in alerting me as to avoid the dreaded overflow. That black drool and the dark goo mixed in his puke was POOP!!! Toxic yucky Felicia Poop!!!

I wiped the mess and grabbed the phone. I called poison control. I explained to the lady that Felicia had very smelly "veggie poop" and that my 23 month old son ate some. She asked me if he vomited. "Yes."
"Did he empty his stomach?"
"I think so."
"Ok, give him some water. He should be fine. It doesn't sound like he digested any of it. Since it was baby feces and the baby is only eating vegetables, there is little risk of bacteria. If he vomits again then take him to the doctor."
I thanked her and hung up the phone.

I felt the panic start to ease. Kenny walked into the dining room and headed for the high chair. He saw that I had cleaned up the contents left in the chair by his sister. I asked him if he was ok. He pointed to the high chair seat and said, "Eat More!"
I had no choice. I sat splat on the kitchen floor in nothing but my underwear and laughed my ass off. I didn't realize that I was still undressed until Kenny walked up to me, sat in my lap, poked my chest and said, "boob."

All that I could do was laugh some more. The kids joined me. At least I know I can handle a crisis. Ha Ha ...